Diary Lies

Dear Diary,

How do you explain this feeling?

You don’t have feeling for this person anymore. You don't enjoy his presence.

You asked him to go and he did.

You didn’t even cry.

You watched Sex and the City rerun on TV and still enjoyed it immensely.

You know you’ve med the right decision.

You congratulate yourself making it for the first night alone without him.

And now you start to feel lonely, a hint of sadness, and an urge to be with someone. And that someone could be him.

This is the process of dealing with grief. Not taking any pain killer. Not trying to sooth my pain by having him back.

I don’t want to be with him anyway.

And that’s the problem. People stay together for the wrong reason.

“Let’s live for the moment. We’ll deal with our issues later.”

So what is the most powerful tool to deal with this? The power of now? Or the power of, what?